Sometimes I wish life would go away and leave me alone for a while. It seems like something is always coming up, and I can’t seem to handle it somehow. I don’t have a busy life in the slightest, but when something does come up I wish I didn’t have to do it.
I envy people with happy lives. I read blogs a lot, I follow several, rarely comment, but always read. It saddens me when people say their days are mostly good. I don’t have a bad life, I’m not on the streets, I’m not on drugs or had a bad childhood. I’m not destitute. I just don’t have a fulfilling life. I’m pretty bored of my life.
It just feels like I’m always waiting for the next bad thing to happen. There’s nothing good to look forward to, only surprise bad things.
It kind of feels like I’m stuck in a loop of similar recurring problems that are always caused by other people. I don’t mind if someone says something hard to take but fair and understandable - I could cope given time if that happened.
What I don’t like is people blatantly LYING TO ME. Saying one thing, then doing the opposite. Saying “oh no, I’d never do that”, then I read somewhere they are doing it. Right there doing it.
Where’s the need for that? What do I do to people to make them feel the need to lie to me, cheat me out of things, leave me, or not even start to be with me in the first place?! It gets my goat that it has happened to me throughout my life and there’s no known cause. Any psychologist might say that the problem lies with the constant.
Want the measure of a man, simply count his friends? It can’t be as simple as that.
There’s no resolution to these issues I’m bringing up, and I don’t expect any kind of response. I’m just in a state of ponderment about things at the moment.
ED. Oh no, I just read the date on here - it's the 21st March :(
Sunday, 21 March 2010
life
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5 comments:
hey awesome expression of emotions.was just doing a random check on the blogs when i stumbled upon yours and boy,am i glad!!great..
I'm glad you like it ;)
Hello Elizabeth,
My name is Hale and I can sympathize with you completely. I too am not on the streets, I haven't had a bad childhood or anything to make me depressed. But I'm bored with life and I'm frustrated that people lie to me, cheat me, tease me and there is no rhyme or reason for it! I'm stuck in college, doing the subjects I've always dreamed of doing, only to realize that the dream and the reality were to completely different things. I've been bullied, crushed and yet I still keep on fighting. My reason? My reason may help you I don't know. My reason is that I'm fighting for the ideal, I'm fighting for what I want and what I dream about. People can shoot me down, life can chuck what it will at me, but the moment I give up is the moment you die. You die inside if you give up. Have a cry, rant and scream to the heavens, but don't ever give up. No one is going to help you, we are all alone on a wide sea, but we have the paddle and we need to steer the course. If there is a storm, we float over it. If there is a wave, we ride it. Life is a challenge, you need to take it on and try to cling to the things that truly matter in your life.
Hope I've helped a little.
Yes. I like this.
I was thinking about this the other day, and am going to blog about it soon.
Thank you for the comment! :D
I used to be pretty down and sad most of the time, but then i realize that everyone only have one life. We only have ONE chance to live. I started to question myself WHAT do i want in my life and HOW do i want to live it. After i make a list, i start planning. Oh yes I agree with you that many people are big liers and fake. Don't let thoes people bring your down and don't let little things in life bring you down. Surround yourself with people that loves you and true to you. Put a distance between people that may harm you. Work hard and play hard. That is how I found happiness and joy in my life.
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